Trinidad is too small

I think the seven degrees of separation rule is probably about three.

My mother calls me from beyond

If you can keep your head when all about you
Are losing theirs and blaming it on you;
If you can trust yourself when all men doubt you,
But make allowance for their doubting too;
If you can wait and not be tired by waiting,
Or, being lied about, don't deal in lies,
Or, being hated, don't give way to hating,
And yet don't look too good, nor talk too wise;

If you can dream - and not make dreams your master;
If you can think - and not make thoughts your aim;
If you can meet with triumph and disaster
And treat those two imposters just the same;
If you can bear to hear the truth you've spoken
Twisted by knaves to make a trap for fools,
Or watch the things you gave your life to broken,
And stoop and build 'em up with wornout tools;

If you can make one heap of all your winnings
And risk it on one turn of pitch-and-toss,
And lose, and start again at your beginnings
And never breath a word about your loss;
If you can force your heart and nerve and sinew
To serve your turn long after they are gone,
And so hold on when there is nothing in you
Except the Will which says to them: "Hold on";

If you can talk with crowds and keep your virtue,
Or walk with kings - nor lose the common touch;
If neither foes nor loving friends can hurt you;
If all men count with you, but none too much;
If you can fill the unforgiving minute
With sixty seconds' worth of distance run -
Yours is the Earth and everything that's in it,
And - which is more - you'll be a woman, my daughter!

Dogs in a manger

I had guards like watchdogs dogs in a manger
I could feel the protection possession and anger
and I drove out of there with no one behind me
Feeling funny and free

All you pretty pretenders
negligent vendors
Aren't you precious inside
I have no need for anger with intimate strangers
And I got nothing to hide

I laughed as I said it
This is my situation
It's not pictures or privilege
Its just self preservation

I don't want you to feel any obligation
would it be so funny to be free

All you pretty pretenders
negligent vendors
Aren't you precious inside
I have no need for anger with intimate strangers
And I got nothing to hide

We act empty and innocent
But we are fueled by distortions of lives led in discontent
Trading misfortunes
(now you guard your faith)
Cause faith is one thing that is hard to deliver
(temper your speed)

It feels funny being free

All you pretty pretenders
negligent vendors
Aren't you precious inside
I have no need for anger with intimate strangers

Pretty pretenders
negligent vendors
Aren't we precious inside
I have no need for anger with intimate strangers
I got nothing to hide

I had guards like watchdogs dogs in a manger

Dog or Dogeater

I am beginning to realise that Cedric may not be a dogeater by nature. He's scared. I mean yeah, Lord voldemort is scary but he is not unbeatable.

It is by examining the true nature of Voldemort and sacrificing himself that Harry Potter was able to beat Lord Voldemort.

But that requires a level of courage and resolve, that I am not sure is in the Trini psyche.

The question becomes, who is the rightful hogwarth's champion. In that minute where they have to decide who takes the cup.

I suspect that Harry Potter needs to go on by himself like in the Philosopher's stone.

For every Bastard, an Angel

Here's to the memory of the person who taught me how to roast chestnuts

Chestnuts roasting on an open fire,
Jack Frost nipping on your nose,
Yuletide carols being sung by a choir,
And folks dressed up like Eskimos.

Everybody knows a turkey and some mistletoe,
Help to make the season bright.
Tiny tots with their eyes all aglow,
Will find it hard to sleep tonight.

And so I'm offering this simple phrase,
To kids from one to ninety-two,
Although its been said many times, many ways,
I am a better person for having known you

LOOKING THROUGH THE EYES OF LOVE

Please, don't let this feeling end,
It's everything I am,
Everything I wanna be;
I can see what's mine now,
Finding out what's true,
Since I've found you
Lookin' through the eyes of love

Now I can take the time,
I can see my life
As it comes on shining now;
Reaching out to touch you,
I can feel so much,
Since I've found you
Lookin' through the eyes of love.

And now I do believe,
That even in a storm, we'll find some light;
Knowing you're beside me,
I'm alright.

A theory

Maybe the thing which made you a good shop owner, came with a hidden compromise which was not detected since the halting language was assumed to be a result of the foreign language barrier and not a thought pattern. Or maybe the original mother tongue, required this said thought pattern which explains a lot.

Uhmmm....

Saying NO

I was once told by a very wise person, that what will save you in this world is when you say no.

Another very wise person told me, is that you do not pick your battles, but you can pick your battlefield.

It takes a lot of effort just to manoeuvre yourself into a position from which you can fight certain battles. But only when you are in position, can you really advance.

Hopefully things will come together next week.

I am ready to start.

New Career Choice

Masters in Occupational Therapy.

Start doing it distance from FIU.

This is the problem with being so bright.

The possibilities are endless, but in some ways this will also suit me.

You read my mind

Trini Girl Blue, must have read my mind.

It's been ten years since my mother died. And I have for some time, 2006 I suspect, been unable to shake this underlying sadness that travels at my side. I remember climbing temple IV in Tikal, Guatemala. It was a trip I had planned for two years prior.

And I watched the moon fade and the sun rise and still, in that perfect moment. Something was missing. I just couldn't put my finger on it.

Then I met Cedric, by happenstance. Or perhaps it was fate. He helped me remember the part of me that is my mother. She lives inside me everyday. But there are parts of her that, now that I am an adult in my own right. I have to leave and put aside.

This is the hardest thing that I will ever have to do in my life.

And I have to do it alone, without her here to tell me its OK.

And that takes a giant leap of faith in my own judgement.

But until I do this, I will never be able to take my place where I truly belong.

Dream job

Design the working relationships and connections between all things.

Each component in a system performs multiple functions, and each function is supported by many elements.

Key to efficient design is observation and replication of natural ecosystems, where designers maximize diversity, stress efficient energy planning, using and accelerating natural succession, and increasing the highly productive "edge-zones" within the system.

Now take any system, natural or man-made and build the controls for cross linkages and feedback.

I highly doubt this is something which is taught in academia.

Particularly for me, since I don't really stop at people or technology or plants. I go Da Vinci

My masters?

Course Code: GINF 5010
Course Title: Principles of Geoinformatics

Course Code: ENGR 6012
Course Title: Hydrology & Drainage Systems

Course Code: ENGR 6013
Course Title: Chemistry & Microbiology for Environmental Engineering

Course Code: MENG 6405
Course Title: Total Quality Management

Course Code: ECNG 6613
Course Title: Database Systems Principles & Design

Course Code: IENG 6002
Course Title : Distributed Information Systems & Databases

AGCP 6250 (AC 624) - WEED SCIENCE (8 Credits)

AGRI 6210 (AP621) - BIOLOGY, ECOLOGY AND EPIDEMIOLOGY
OF PESTS (4 Credits)

AGSL 6143 (AS 643) - TROPICAL SOIL SCIENCE (4 Credits)

AGSL 6140 (AS 640) - SOIL CHEMISTRY AND FERTILITY
(4 Credits)

AGSL 6141 (AS 641) - SOIL WATER MANAGEMENT

COMP6400 (CS64B) - DESIGN AND ANALYSIS OF
ALGORITHMS (4 Credits)

COMP6730 (CS62C) - CRYPTOGRAPHY (4 Credits)

E-books

I really do want this book, but ....

I think I need yet another credit card.

Really my life is getting way too complicated.

2010 ?

1990... will we ever learn
Or will our children keep running and running
until the end of time
1990... will hands of love ever reach out
Or will they be there just to strengthen the crime?
It is strange that the more we change, rearrange
Everything still feels the same

2010... please make a liar of me

Thoughts on Obama

I have been having several conversations with different people about the status quo in this country. I have also been reading Obama's Dreams of my father.

Maybe it is naive, but we need to decide if the time is coming when we too, shall challenge the status quo of this country.

It has been a long time since I have had race and skin tone and class, openly thrown in my face against me. It's ......beyond words.

But beyond the anger and despair. Is the audacity of Hope.

Hope that we can challenge our ancestors legacy of fear.

Refuse to hand it down.

And each do our part, in our own little sphere, to impart understanding.

Third time lucky?

I don't go to therapy to find out if I'm a freak
I go and I find the one and only answer every week
And it's just me and all the memories to follow
Down any course that fits within a fifty minute hour
And we fathom all the mysteries, explicit and inherent
When I hit a rut, she says to try the other parent
And she's so kind, I think she wants to tell me something,
But she knows that it's much better if I get it for myself...
And she says

Oooooooh,aaaaaaah, what do you hear in these sounds?
And... oooooooh,aaaaaaah
What do you hear in these sounds? ? ? ? ?

I say I hear a doubt, with the voice of true believing
And the promises to stay, and the footsteps that are leaving
And she says "oh", I say "what? "...she says "exactly",
I say"what, you think I'm angry
Does that mean you think I'm angry? "
She says "look, you come here every week
With jigsaw pieces of your past
Its all on little soundbytes and voices out of photographs
And that's all yours, that's the guide, that's the map
So tell me, where does the arrow point to?
Who invented roses? "
And.......

Oooooooh,aaaaaaah
What do you hear in these sounds?
And...oooooooh,aaaaaaah
What do you hear in these sounds? ? ? ? ?

And when I talk about therapy, I know what people think
That it only makes you selfish and in love with your shrink
But oh how I loved everybody else
When I finally got to talk so much about myself............

And I wake up and I ask myself what state I'm in
And I say well I'm lucky, cause I am like east berlin
I had this wall and what I knew of the free world
Was that I could see their fireworks
And I could hear their radio
And I thought that if we met, I would only start confessing
And they'd know that I was scared
They'd would know that I was guessing
But the wall came down and there they stood before me
With their stumbling and their mumbling
And their calling out just like me...and...

Oooooooh,aaaaaaah, the stories that nobody hears...and...

Oooooooh,aaaaaaah, and I collect these sounds in my ears...and

Oooooooh,aaaaaaah, that's what I hear in these sounds...and...